Heart Pour II: Who Are You Spending Your Time With?
Everything is energy. EVERYTHING. Whatever we’re plugged into is either charging or siphoning our energy.
Who are you spending your time with?
The first figure to come to mind was the person I was seeing.
I opened my heart to him.
I shared my mind with him.
I gifted my body to him.
I spent my time with him.
I trusted him…enough to pour my POWER into him. But I didn’t say this aloud to her. I kept these thoughts to myself.
The next question she asked was: How does someone prove themselves trustworthy?
This one had me stuck. Not because I didn’t have an answer, but because in my heartspace I immediately realized a painful truth.
Now there’s this thing we often do when we don’t want to acknowledge something as truth. Denial! I was in denial. I turned a blind eye, I discarded the possibility. There was no way HE was deceptive.
Moving on…
I continued working diligently to build and push Black Girl Champion. Writing messages and posting videos to express the two truths of my Golden Ticket/Power discovery:
When you look into the mirror, you should see Power.
Black women are Black Girl Champions.
Sales were still blocked. Women weren’t purchasing Black Girl Champion Crowns for themselves. Women weren’t purchasing Power dolls for their mini champions.
My message wasn’t resonating.
I began to replay that conversation, moments shared with him, the sets, scenes, the experience. I had prior to this connection lived an abundant life. I attracted flows of money, ease, and fruitful connections easily. That all began to shift the more I attached and accepted a situation of uncertainty, built on a foundation of lies and a lack of love.
I was pouring a large percentage of my power into this connection, down a drain. My fruits of spirit were being wasted, discarded, mocked, taken advantage of. Worse yet, I was letting it happen.
My illusion of love served as a disguise for unworthiness.
My illusion of love served as a disguise for powerlessness.
My illusion of love served as a disguise for settling.
I was making a choice to accept this illusion, one that disempowered me; all the while, I was turning on my camera screaming out to the world: You Are Power!
No wonder you couldn’t hear me.
I couldn’t hear myself.
I was screaming from a personal Hell that I had chosen.
The only way out was to reclaim, embody, and remember my Power.
The only way out was to become a Black Girl Champion in all areas of my life. Not just with this business endeavor.
I had to take responsibility for being irresponsible with my own heart.
I had to quit accepting a losing situation.